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January 01.2026
2 Minutes Read

Effective Techniques to Change Someone’s Mind: Asking Questions Matters

What Actually Works to Change Someone’s Mind

Understanding the Power of Persuasion

Changing someone’s mind is a complex process. Jonah Berger, a professor at the Wharton School, emphasizes in his recent podcast interview that efforts to push people into believing what you believe often backfire. Instead of bombarding them with data or emotional narratives, effective persuasion relies on a much subtler approach.

The Art of Asking Questions

One of the keys to changing minds is to engage the other person through questions, rather than assertions. This technique encourages the individual to feel that they are actively participating in their journey of change. When questions are posed thoughtfully, they foster an environment of shared exploration, making the person feel invested in the discussion.

Berger’s insights resonate with those from other experts like Zakary Tormala of Stanford, who likewise advocates for communication that invites dialogue. Tormala explains that using the pronoun ‘you’ and posing questions can significantly increase engagement, making the listener more receptive to new ideas.

Engagement Through Relevance

Matt Abrahams from Stanford mentions the importance of making your message relevant. Being relatable significantly enhances engagement. When people see the immediate relevance of a topic to their lives, they are more likely to pay attention. Whether discussing health guidelines, community issues, or social beliefs, communicating urgency can draw people in and prompt them to consider new perspectives.

Building Trust and Reducing Resistance

A recurring theme in effective persuasion is the necessity of creating a trusting relationship. In instances where resistance is likely, such as controversial topics, using inclusive language can ease tensions. Phrases that emphasize collaboration—like ‘we’ and ‘together’—can break down barriers and foster a sense of belonging, encouraging openness to new ideas.

Ben Wise and Darren Chiu from Captivate stress a similar point about the misbelief that communication is purely rational. Effective persuasion involves recognizing emotional influences as well. By reframing messages to incorporate emotional and psychological considerations, you can communicate much more effectively.

Practicing Persuasive Strategies

Here are some practical tips to enhance your persuasive abilities:

  • Establish Common Ground: Start conversations by identifying shared interests or beliefs, which can create a foundation for dialogue.
  • Ask Thoughtful Questions: Instead of making statements, pose questions that prompt critical thinking and self-reflection.
  • Foster a Sense of Urgency: Highlight immediate relevance to encourage attention and responsiveness to your message.
  • Use Inclusive Language: Utilize pronouns that promote unity and shared objectives, reducing defensive reactions.
  • Respond to Resistance: When faced with pushback, acknowledge the other person’s concerns and show understanding to mitigate defensiveness.

Final Thoughts on Influencing Others

Changing someone’s mind is not about winning an argument but about guiding them on a path to discover new truths that resonate with them. By adopting thoughtful questioning, emphasizing relatability, and cultivating a trustworthy dialogue, we can create genuine connections that lead to transformative discussions.

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